existential_902

existential_902

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i understand where im coming from
last edit
Jan 1, 2022 4:29 AM

but theres always this fear for some reason that i may forget where im coming from or i may misunderstand myself or that if someone were to come across my works or thought processes they may not understand or may misunderstand or may not know where im coming from. so i feel inhibited sometimes because i for example would like to use certain codewords or codes or like write text in a certain way for myself, for myself to come back to. but i sometimes find myself having to write in a way that is vanilla for the lay man to understand. and sometimes this may manifest in music. which is unfortunate. i know what im trying to do, but others may not, and thus i sometimes feel inclined to make things more explicit or obvious. eg non-metered bass swells..or subtle chord progressions that take a listening ear and not a passive ear.

there is a death to individuality and subtley. to detail. but i am becoming more comfortable in my own skin where i can plant my own codes, for myself to understand and no one else. to want to eradicate the common archtype of the tall standing attractive male.